He's Asleep Now

Jordy passed away in my arms today at 4.15pm. :(

I am so glad it was this way and not with the needle.

There was no one here except for he and I and my sweetheart Jen was with us the whole time via the phone. I am so glad I was able to comforted him as he went.

I can't write anything else right now :( I will do that when I can.

Getting Worse

3:10pm

Okay things have got really bad here :( I rang the Vet this morning at 9am and was told she would ring me back at lunch because she was busy with consultations. So far today Jordy has had three painful breathing attacks! I can only assume the cancer is in his lungs. I know now that he is in pain and all I want is to make it that the pain is gone for him forever!!

So at 2pm with him having an attack, I rang the Vet back to ask what was going on. She wasn't even there!! She had gone through my town on her way to another town 30 mins down the road!!! WTF!! I ask the girl on the phone if she could get someone else to come and administer the needle for Jordy and she said the best they could do would be for me to bring him there (45min drive) in the morning!! What the hell is up with Western Australia!! I swear that nothing here is done in a professional way! No ... I said ... I can't possibly bring him there tomorrow because he is in terrible pain NOW ... and the trip would stress him out to much :( She puts me on hold :( Comes back and says ... the vet will come by on her way back home ... but she hasn't got a Nurse and cats usually struggle a lot so it wouldn't be nice. I said ... I don't care that giving him a needle might not be nice. I would rather that than have to see him in pain!!

So the vet will be here at around 5.30 - 6.00 tonight. I hope that Jordy can get lots of sleep between now and then and doesn't have to suffer any more. I can't stand to see him in pain.

The Road to Home

It's been such a long time since I have written anything here. I guess in a way that is a blessing, no bad news to report so little Jordy has been going well. Up until now that is.

I went away for the Xmas/New Year break and had a friend look after the boys while I was away. When I returned home she informed me that Jordy had been missing for three days but that he had come back and all was fine. He seemed fine too, although he was looking a lot skinnier. Apart from that he was normal, eating and sleeping with me. Still wanting his rubs and cuddles.

During this week however, he has taken to just being under the house all day, only coming out at night to have a mouthful of food and then going up to my spare room and sleeping here till morning, when he would cry to be let and and go under the house again for the day :(

I am more than sure now that the cancer has progressed and is well and truly in his system and although he doesn't appear to be in any physical pain ... I can tell that Jordy is not well at all. Now I have to make the decision. :( Why is this so hard to do? I have known this day would come for two years now. Knowing doesn't make it any easier :(

I will try to do updates here as soon as things happen, I know there will be people who read this with loving pets that will go thru the same situation and will appreciate knowing what Jordy and I went thru in regards to ending his beautiful life in a humane and dignified way.

I hope to god I can get him cremated somehow. :( I don't want to leave my little man behind when I leave here :(

I rang the Vet first thing this morning. She is busy until lunch time and is going to ring me back. I will have a good talk with her and discuss my options then. The vet is 60km away and at this stage ... taking Jordy there would be too stressful. I hope to god she can get over here today to see him.

Jordy

Jordy
Originally uploaded by Craig Shillington

Jordy Update :) :)

Hi Everyone :) I am so sorry it has been so long since I did an update in here.


Jordy is doing exceptionally well!!! It has now been a little over a year since he had his operation and had the Cancer (and his eye) removed. He still has cancer around his good eye and it bled for the very first time last night, since his last freezing about 8 months ago. It was at that time the Vet suggested I had Jordy put down!! I am so glad I didn't listen!! Apart from his sore looking eye (and me wiping it every night) there appears to be nothing wrong with my little Alien! He still goes outside most of the day, purrs, brings me his prey to show off and is not in pain.


Thank you once again to those that have given so lovingly to the Jordy Fund in Red Bubble. I have been VERY quiet in RB over the last few months and so the Fund has slowed down a lot. But we appreciate all the help we have gotten this far :) :) {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}

Mr Sleepy Head :)

I am so sorry it has been so long since I did an update on Jordy. I know there are a lot of you that check back here often and I am sorry it has taken me so long to let you know how the little man is doing.


Jordy has started to slow down a lot. I have noticed a big change in him over the last month or so. He has gone from being a pretty well outside Kitty, to being inside 90% of the time and sleeping either by my feet, or up in the spare room in the cool and dark. It's very hard to see this in my Jordy. I sorta know that this is probably the start of the end and now I will need to find the strength to watch closer for signs of pain with him.



At this stage I cannot see that he is in any extra pain that would concern me. Being a 14 year old cat (and with the heat wave we have been having here lately) his being inside might just be a sign that he is getting old. He has arthritis in his hind legs so that may be playing up and making him feel more like being inside too. His eye has not bled again since the last operation at the vets and that seems like a good sign to me. I do notice his eye is always watery and I can see he has cancer lumps on his third eyelid as well, so I would think there would be a bit of discomfort from that too.


I need to start thinking about what to do if Jordy decides he wants to leave before I have sold my house and moved back to Ballarat. I so want to get him cremated so that I can still take him *home* and bury him properly at some stage where I can still visit him and won't feel like I have left him behind here in Western Australia. Burying him here will be the hardest thing I will do, if it comes to that. :( The only thing is the nearest place I maybe could get him cremated is in Perth (which is two hours drive for me). I couldn't make that drive with him beside me in the car. If anyone from Western Australia is reading this and you know of a place closer to Kellerberrin that cremates Pets ... I would be very appreciative of your help.

I took these photos of Jordy today :) :) He followed me outside this afternoon while I did a bit of Gardening. :) He is still outside so he must be enjoying himself ... and that makes his Daddy VERY happy :) :)

Thank you so much to everyone who has followed Jordy's story and has given to the Jordy Fund I have going on Red Bubble to pay for his Vet bills. You support and love is amazing and it means so much to both Jordy and myself :)

Thank you Ibah~ - Jordy's Card :)

Click the Card to go leave a comment in Flickr :)

I would like to thank a new friend of mine Ibah~ from Flickr, for this beautiful gift to Jordy. :) VBS

She read Jordy’s Story here on my blog and wanted to share the love as much as she could and made this gorgeous card for him, signed by friends and fur kids alike :) :) Jordy loves it so much!!!

Thank you so much to Ibah and everyone else involved in making this loving card for Jordy :) :)

The Strongest Man in the World

Well my little man seems to be recovering from his latest surgery pretty well. :) His fur is slowly growing back over his face and arm and the parts of Cancer they burned off have scabbed up pretty well and should heal soon. When I first got him home I kept him inside for a few days. We went out together at night so he could go to the toilet privately (giggle) and have a little sniff around etc :) He really hates being locked up inside and I hate taking that freedom from him, even though I worry about him so much and would rather have him inside with me all the time. He just seems to get a little depressed being locked up and I would rather the last few months of his life to be spent happy and carefree :)

He finished a course of anti-biotic tablets on Wednesday, so all he has to take from now on is some pain killer and anti inflammatory drops in his food and eye drops twice a day. He hates the eye drops the most, but I think he also understands he needs to have them. I always cuddle him so close after I give those and tell him how much I love him. I can't believe the strength he has. He is such a brave and humble kitty! I am so proud of him for all he has suffered and gone thru. I just wish now we could have cured him, but I know he has had a wonderful life and he has given me so much happiness and so many beautiful memories. It's going to be very hard to say goodbye to him :(



I would like to thank Ibah so much for her support with helping to get the Jordy Story out there and also recently for the wonderful Card she has made for people to sign and send their love and wishes to Jordy. It is really appreciated so much!! {{{{{{hug}}}}}

If you would like to see how the Jordy Fund is going click HERE and have a look at all the wonderful support Jordy and I have received. If you would like to also support Jordy you can purchase anything I have for offer on my Red Bubble site from T-shirts and Calendars to Framed Prints and Cards.

Thank you all so very much!!!!

Jordy The T-Shirt :)

Another Tee for those who have followed the Jordy Story and would like to have something they can wear proudly in support of him and myself :) :) If you would like to see how the Jordy Fund is doing click HERE

This Tee was lovingly designed and offered to me to go towards the Jordy Fund by my Angel TBO. Here is what she has to say about it :) :)

Jordy is the biggest cat and loudest purrer I have ever seen/heard! He is also loved dearly by so many. He is loved so much he’s like everyone’s favourite teddy bear from our childhood. He’s a tough kitty in every sense of the word!

The reason why i wanted to do this b/c i think its important to give. I do this without my TBO logo, this is not about me, but about Craig and Jordy, both whom I love so much. If two people can work together and get a message out there, then its twice as powerful. So if you’re a fan of TBO or a fan of Craig and Jordy’s – or even both (oh you!) then buy this tee and show your support!

Thank you so much Princess … we love you so much!!! XXX

P.S. Click the Tee above to view Colours and sizes :)

Or Click here to view this at Red Bubble and read the comments :)

Jordy Update (Wed 5th Nov 2008)

Well I was meant to take Jordy to the Vet (who was visiting town today) but I ended up rushing him into the Vet 45mins away yesterday after a sleepless night with him on Monday. I have him home with me again, he stayed in there over night because he had eaten Monday morning and they didn’t want to put him under on the day because of that. Sunday night while I was petting him in the quiet in bed, I could hear strange noises coming from his head. At first I thought it was the sound of static, but it wasn’t making the noise when I stroked his back, so I listened closer and a huge fear struck me. It sounded as if the skin on his head was dead and was crinkling as I petted him. I panicked!!! I thought that the Operation months ago had failed and that the blood supply to his skin there had stopped and I also linked the blood from his eye to that.

The vet assured me that his skin was fine. She suggested it might have been trapped air under the skin. Although she explained something to me that I didn’t understand before now properly….. Jordy isn’t cured of cancer. :( As a matter of fact it is just going to get worse for him and what I am doing is just prolonging his life (and therefore maybe also … his pain) :( The cancer he has on his eyelid is not curable … just treatable. I can keep taking him to have bits and pieces of it frozen off … but it will get worse and worse and his pain will continue to get worse also. I am not sure now if I should be continuing to keep the treatment up or not :( This visit alone cost me just under $400. It’s money I don’t have as I am still paying off his Operation, with the help and support and love of those who have contributed to the Jordy fund thus far.

Sadly now I (and all of you who have followed his story) will need to figure out when the time has come to let Jordy be free. It’s not something I want to think about right now, but it is something that will happen in the next few months and this is so hard for me right now. I would like to thank you all for your compassion and love, following Jordy's story and letting him into your hearts. I know my love for Jordy is shared by so many of you and it helps so much. I am so sorry this update isn’t as happy as I would have liked it to have been. He is still here and he is happy and comfortable. And I love him VERY much … we all do!!!

Sweet Dreams

Jordy hasn't seemed to be himself much lately. He has taken to going up to my room and sleeping under the bed by himself which is very unlike him. His eye has been bleeding on and off since I got him back. About every week or so it lets go of a lot of blood so I am hoping it isn't another tumor in behind his eye.

Hopefully it is just an infected third eye-lid which I will be able to have removed. I haven't had the money to drive him the hour to the Vet plus pay for the bill sadly. But I found out they come here to town once a month and so have booked him in to see them on Wed 5th Nov.

They said they can't do a lot but will have a look at him and at least we will know if this is serious or not. Fingers crossed it's nothing to worry about. I hate to think my little boy is in pain and isn't telling me. He is so strong and I love him so much!!!

Love Is Blind - Painted :)

I received the most beautiful gift from my sweet Soulmate for my 41st Birthday this year. She surprised me by doing this gorgeous painting of Jordy and sent it to me in the mail. :) Needless to say when I opened that package from her and saw this I cried my eyes out!!

Jen, I love you so much darling and you have no idea how much I love to hold you!! I feel your love so much everyday and in so many ways :) Thank you so much Darling for bringing me to believe again!! xoxo

You can see more of Jen's wonderful creative work (and maybe even buy some acrylic on Cardboard just like this) by going to her site here. :) VBS

Ta Daaaaaaaa :) :)

VBS :) Well .... it has been quite a while since I posted an update; mainly because I wanted to give Jordy a chance to heal so the new photos wouldn't be more of the same. His healing is coming along really well :) :) His fur still hasn't grown all the way back, but already it is covering the scar really well :)

And Jordy seems to be doing much better than he was before the operation ... he's much more smoochie (is that possible) and is eating more and is now staying much closer to the house during the day. He even now has a routine where he sleeps with me every night :) :)

We would both like to thank you all so much for following his progress and also for taking the time to look, comment and donate you time, love and money :) :) Remember that I will be donating ALL the profits from the sales of my work at Red Bubble towards the cost of the operation until that is paid in full ... and will continue to put the works sold and total made in the Jordy Fund :) :)

My Alien is Home :) :)

Well ... he is finally home :) My little baby man!! It was the biggest day yesterday and I will never forget when the Nurse and Dr walked me into the consultation room and I saw him in his little cage. So raw ... so stitched ... but he saw me with his single eye ... and meowed!! I nearly cried!! Jordy I have been so worried about you. God I missed you matie!!! Straight away I let my fingers weave between the mesh at the front of the cage ... and straight away he rubbed my fingers .... like only he knows how to do. :) :)

The Dr started to explain to me exactly what they had done ... and how I should now care for him. Thankfully they had a written sheet made up for me, because his words seemed garbled and no matter how much I tried to listen and look at the Dr ... my eyes kept being drawn back to Jordy in his tiny cage, wanting out so he could give Dad a damn good cuddle.




So we both looked at each other while the Dr said his stuff ... I thanked him and the Nurse and made my way back to the car with him. For the last 4 days Jordy has been spoiled rotten by being in a much larger cage ... with his collar on and being so confined now in his smaller pet cage he was very anxious to just be out. I reached over again and put my fingers thru the mesh and started tickling his neck ... he started weeing .... *Good boy Jordy ... I don't care matie, let it all out. The towel will soak it up and we'll be home in 2 hrs anyway.*


He and I slept together alone last night. Fudge was not happy. Needless to say, apart from the wounds from surgery and the cumbersome collar ... Jordy was being his usual self (which meant waking Dad every hour for rubs). I didn't get a lot of sleep ... but I was so happy :)



Okay ... so for the next 2 weeks Jordy has to be kept confined in a room by himself. It was going to be my bedroom, but after last night, I think the spare room would be a better option. ;) The stitches will be taken out after two weeks and then we can remove his collar. :) I bet he can't wait for that. :) I fed him last night ... to do so I needed to remove his collar which was fine while he was eating, but boy do I need to keep an eye on him. Without warning he will start scratching at his stitches, so I needed to find an easier way for him to eat and drink (and so he can have food and water while I am at work) without taking his collar off. Thanks to Jen (TBO) we figured out a way :) Two One Litre Milk Cartons cut down the middle so he can get his face in there without the collar getting in the way.

So now it's just a matter of letting the tissue heal and waiting for the two weeks to have the stitches taken out. We aren't out of the woods yet. There are still a few things that could go wrong (like the flap of skin not getting enough blood supply and dying etc) but as far as things look right now he is 100% :)

Thank you so much to everyone for your well wishes and you donations towards the Jordy Fund. :) Until these bills have been paid fully ... I will be donating 100% of all the profits I make in Red Bubble towards that Jordy fund. So if you buy something of mine ... I will be putting your purchase and Profit on the Jordy Fund Page.

His ears were removed 10 years ago from skin cancer ... this time he had his right eye removed. His lip and nose look pulled in the photos (they are from stretching the skin to cover his eye socket) but over time that will relax and will cover with fur and will hardly be noticeable :) He doesn't look the best ... but I am just happy that he has had the cancer removed ... and to be honest with you ... I think he is going to look just as handsome ... if not MORE so with only one eye and no ears :) :)

If Only Tonight We Could Sleep ....... forever.

(Click the lyrics to listen to the song)

if only tonight we could sleep
in a bed made of flowers
if only tonight we could fall
in a deathless spell
if only tonight we could slide
into deep black water
and breathe
and breathe...

then an angel would come
with burning eyes like stars
and bury us deep
in his velvet arms

and the rain would cry
as our faces slipped away
and the rain would cry

don't let it end...

Today I received some sad news. My little Jordy man has Cancer again. :( I am at a point right now where I am very lost. Anyone that knows me well enough, will understand the bond I have with my Three Boys ... but especially so with Jordy ... my little Alien.

When Jordy was about 4 years old, he got skin cancer in his ears. Something a lot of animals with white fur get. Luckily Kim and I got him to the Vet before it had a chance to spread and they cut it out. Since then, Jordy has been my no ears little Alien. The Ironic thing is that when Kim brought him home as a Present ... I said he was the ugliest cat I had ever seen .... he is now the most beautiful thing I have had in my life.

The vet has told me without Chemo, he probably has about 3 months to live ... but that is with pain. :( I can't afford the Chemo for him sadly. :( And even with the Chemo, the cancer is too far spread ... it won't cure him this time ... just prolong his life.

With a heavy heart I now need to make a decision on timing :( At some time soon I need to figure out that Jordy is suffering and allow him to be free of that, so he can forever watch over me. This will be one of the hardest things I will have done. I am going to share the next few months here .... some of this may not be nice, but it will help me too. I am going to miss .... this gorgeous Monkey on My Back so much!!!

Isn't Love Beautiful :) :)

I have been meaning to start writing again, I have so many wonderful emotions flowing through my soul right now ... and every time I think I find some time to sit and express how I am feeling in words something comes up. I have also been a little under the weather of late ... but ....!!!!

It has been such a wonderful time, these last couple of months :) I am falling so hard and I love her so much!! She means the world to me and she makes me feel so happy and so loved!!

It doesn't really matter if I feel a little sick, or unmotivated. If I come home from work a little down ... as soon as I see you baby ... I am so high again!!! I can't believe how good it feels to have you in my life. You are the single most important thing to me sweetheart and I am falling deeper and deeper in Love with you every single day! :) You are the most beautiful Woman And I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you Darling :) :) I LOVE YOU!!!! I can't wait for all my dreams to become yours as well Mwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Valentine and other Lovely Things :)

Well, another year has past and Valentines day has been and gone once again :) This time last year was the loneliest Valentine's Day I have spent. But oh what a contrast this year was :) Finding love and now walking that walk again is such a beautiful feeling. Having something so beautiful to work towards and feeling love again in my life, makes waiting and hoping so much easier to do. :) :) Thank you darling :) I love you :) :)

I will try to get the next three sales items from the Bub up this weekend. I also want to work on a New Tee, will see how I go with that. I have so many ideas floating around in my head at the moment, I have no idea where to start. I should work on my latest Poem/song too. :) I feel the need ;)